From Eggs to Epiphanies: My Journey Through Self-Discovery and Depression

The first time I discovered I was depressed I remember I was on a call with my best friend.

View from my NYC apartment

Staring out my New York City apartment overlooking the Upper West Side, the sky was filled with orange light and deep heavy clouds hovering just above the sky scrapers. As I stared at the city I dreamed of being a part of my entire life, i blurted out the four words that would kickstart my self-discovery journey:

“I think I’m depressed.”

Calling it what it was felt strange, leaving me unsure. But that sparked my first conversation ever about mental health. That moment of self awareness catapulted me into a series of changes in my life. It’s like I woke up from sleep walking and somehow I couldn’t remember three whole years. I stopped smiling, wearing color, looking up, enjoying anything. 

The Egg-citing Revelation

25 year old me struggling and covering it up with makeup and fashion.

It all started with a carton of eggs. Yes, eggs. I had just gotten home and I was standing in my kitchen with a carton of eggs. Problem was I never bought eggs. When I backtracked my day, I remembered leaving work, hopping a train, getting off, walking into a fancy market, grabbing the eggs and apparently I JUST WALKED OUT. I walked out with these eggs I didn't remember to pay for, rode a train six stops uptown and made it into my apartment unaware of my egg escapade. I flipped wondering if I should return the eggs or get help.

In my panic, I did what any sensible person would do: I called my best friend. 

“You won’t believe what just happened,” I started, my voice shaky. As I recounted the absurdity of my egg escapade, I realized this was more than a bizarre shopping trip; it was a signal that I needed to dig deeper into my own mental health.

My best friend and soul sis Jessy on one of our soul searching adventures in NOLA. A good story for another time.

While she may not have been a licensed therapist, she was my emotional rock.

As we talked, she helped me understand what depression really meant. Interestingly enough, she had just come to terms with her own struggles, which made our conversation even more powerful.

We called it our “quarter-life crisis,” but in reality, it felt like a much-needed wake-up call. It was time to take control, to fight back against the fog that had settled over our lives.

Together, we embarked on a mission: to shed everything that had pulled us away from the people we knew we could be. We had to get creative and rediscover our true selves.

Three Tips for Using Self-Discovery to Combat Depression

1. Embrace Self-Awareness: The first step was learning to acknowledge my feelings. I started keeping a journal, jotting down my thoughts and emotions. This practice not only helped me identify triggers but also allowed me to express a lifetime of feelings I’d been bottling up. Through the years, I tested out the many different forms of journaling and created my own personal method that worked for me. The best part about this, there are no concrete rules to how you decide to journal. It is meant to be creative, messy, and all together a method to your madness in order to find inner peace.

   How my bestie and I got started? We sent each other thought provoking questions. Some made us laugh, others took us back to our childhood, and the hard ones...those made it clear where to spend more time discovering.

2. Connect with Others: I realized the power of sharing my experiences. Talking openly with friends and family made me feel less isolated. I found that many people were willing to share their own struggles, creating a community of support that was invaluable. Engage in conversations about mental health—just like I did with my best friend. You’ll be surprised at how many people are navigating similar journeys, and together, you can create a supportive community that inspires growth. Not sure who to start with? Facebook has a plethora of groups you can explore that help you test opening up without the social anxiety. Once you tested out sharing your vulnerable thoughts, move on to sharing with the people who matter in your life. Connecting helps relationships grow and bonds to strengthen,

3. Rediscover Your Passions: I made a commitment to engage in activities that brought me joy—something I had neglected. Whether it was filling out questionnaires, exploring the city, or trying out new outfits, these little sparks of creativity helped reignite my zest for life. Some ideas lit me up, while I noticed I outgrew the desire to so come, and that's okay! You can change your mind about what you were once passionate about. The fun part is discovering what to try out next.

Your Self-Discovery Homework (Don’t worry, it’s the fun kind!)

1. Journal Your Heart Out

Grab a notebook, your phone, or even a napkin (seriously, anything works). Each day this week, take 5-10 minutes to answer this question: "How am I feeling today?" Don’t overthink it! If it’s random thoughts, doodles, or even a grocery list mixed in—that’s okay. The goal is to become aware of your emotions, no matter how small. If you’re feeling adventurous, swap questions with a friend. You might be surprised at where the conversation takes you!

2. Connect and Share

This week, pick one person in your life and start a meaningful conversation. It doesn’t have to be super deep at first. Ask them how they’re really doing or share a recent experience you’ve had. Bonus points if you both open up about mental health! Don’t have someone in mind? Hop into an online group or forum and engage there—start small and see where it leads. You’re building your support team!

3. Rediscover Your Joy

Plan one small activity this week that makes you smile or feel curious. Is it dancing in your room, trying a new recipe, or wandering through your neighborhood? Whatever it is, make time for it. If you try something and realize it’s not for you anymore, that’s cool too! Jot down how you felt before, during, and after—let it guide you in finding what truly lights you up.

Your Journey Awaits

Self-discovery isn’t just about confronting your feelings; it’s about reclaiming your narrative. My journey began with a carton of eggs, but it transformed into so much more. I learned to embrace my struggles, connect with others, and rediscover the vibrant person I once was.

Are you ready to take that first step? If you find yourself feeling lost, don’t hesitate to reach out. Let’s embark on this journey together—because you don’t have to navigate this path alone. Embrace your story and start your own journey toward self-discovery today!

LET ME BE YOUR JESSY